I have just read the Kidscope Grandparent's Guide to bullying and read this:
For example, if there is a
friendship group and one child is continually
called a nickname that is offensive or
embarrassing even if they appear to laugh
it off (e.g chubster, geek, boffin, batty boy)
Does that mean Frederick Trotteville was a victim of bullying?
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
calling a kid 'Boffin' is now bullying? We would often say 'you boffin!' to kids when I was at school, and some would say it to me - 'Rob's such a boffin!' - I didn't realise I was being bullied.
To me, bullying was being dragged around the floor by my hood, so I was nearly strangled, having people wipe their dirty shoes on my trousers because they were 'too clean', having my pencil-case thrown around the room, being kicked in the head and all over, by 20 members of my class as I lay on the floor in a corridor, and finally being dragged down a flight of stairs by two boys who were later suspended for glue-sniffing.
Boffin was a friendly term, not bullying. People need to 'get a life' when it comes to understanding what bullying really is, these days. Yes, names can be a form of bullying, but 'Boffin' hardly constitutes it.
'Oh voice of Spring of Youth
hearts mad delight,
Sing on, sing on, and when the sun is gone
I'll warm me with your echoes
through the night.'
I sympathise Rob. That can't have been an easy time for you.
A boy I went to school with all through my junior school years moved back into the area and started to attend my senior school for the very last two years of his schooling. He didn't know anyone in the school but me.
Although Stephen was a tall,well built,tough lad like myself he was being badly bullied by about six 'tough guys' in my year simply for being new to the school.
This really got to me seeing how very unhappy it was making Stephen. I told Stephen to leave the problem with me.
I then approached the head tough guy and told him very politely I would be most grateful if they would stop picking on Stephen as he was my friend and apologise to him immediately.
The guy said 'and if we don't?'... I informed him of the procedures that would occur if he decided not to take heed of my friendly chat.
The next day Stephen came up to me extremely happy,with a grateful grin on his face.He said 'I don't know what you've done or said but I'm suddenly not getting bullied anymore'.
I was playing the guitar in a band at school at the time and thereafter Stephen joined our large circle of muso's,mods,rockers,punks etc etc - many of whom were quite proficient with the 'axe' and also the fist - but only if absolutely necessary.
" A kind heart always brings its own reward," said Mrs. Lee.
- The Christmas Tree Aeroplane - Society Member
This happened to me at various times throughout my first year of Secondary school, then calmed down - although the two boys who sniffed glue (and were later suspended) bullied me in the third year - that was separate.
I was very tall but also very thin - weedy - a bit bookish - hated sport and wasn't very good at football, rugby, etc. I was excellent at art and English, and at javelin, sprinting etc - but these didn't count for much in our school (amongst the kids anyway). We had a 'strict anti-bullying policy' in our school too - which just meant the bullies made extra careful to do their bullying when no teachers were likely to be around.
The whole-class bullying only lasted about two weeks maybe. It was horrendous - but like most children who are bullied, I kept it to myself. The reason for my being bullied was that I wore clean freshly-washed clothes, home-made jumpers, and had shiny shoes, and was also quite shy and well spoken. I had a baptism of fire and soon learned to swear, speak more roughly, and act more tough, in order to fit in.
To my shame I also admit that when the bullies turned from me to a small shrimpy lad in another class, I joined in, albeit from the back - because I was just so glad to have the attention taken off me. That's what being bullied can do.
When I was in teacher training, the teacher I was with, in a Catholic school, once dragged a little boy (aged 6) across the room and flung him in a corner, for looking round during Mass. This was one of the moments that made me realise I probably couldn't teach. I couldn't stand by and watch teachers bully their children and feel I could do nothing about it. I should have reported her, but she was my mentor, so what could I do? I wanted to drag HER by the hair to the head teacher!
Bullying happens everywhere and that 'red mist' still descends when I see it - even online. I will never tolerate bullying these days and always react badly if I feel it is happening.
'Oh voice of Spring of Youth
hearts mad delight,
Sing on, sing on, and when the sun is gone
I'll warm me with your echoes
through the night.'
If Fatty secretly minded being called Fatty, I suppose it was bullying. The problem with things like these is that those who are bullied will often never really show that they are being bullied, and that it is affecting them.
As far as old Fatty is concerned, though, I daresay he truly took it all in stride.
Of course, it all depends on context, and Fatty is never called 'Fatty' in a nasty way. When I was a kid, people sometimes called me 'Skinny' - because I was painfully thin despite eating a lot. I never felt it was bullying or nasty because people said it in a friendly way.
'Oh voice of Spring of Youth
hearts mad delight,
Sing on, sing on, and when the sun is gone
I'll warm me with your echoes
through the night.'
I always remember a local dwarf. He was always known as "Lofty" - although I never called him that as I was much younger than him. He never seemed to mind, but I wonder...
I'm reading ebook titled Pushing Up Daisies by M.C. Beaton at the moment.
I'm on page 154 and I remember this thread when I read the conversations below:
...A small round black-tempered woman answered the door. "What?" she demanded.
Toni(one of the detective) knew that if she said they were detectives, this woman would slam the door on them, so she said instead, "Miss Clutter wanted a word with us after the funeral."
"What about?"
Jake(the other detective) stepped forward, "Look," he said haughtily, "just do your job and run and get her, Stop standing there with your mouth open. Hop to it!
"No need to get cheeky with me, young man," she said, but she retired into the darkness of the hall behind her, leaving the door open.
"You were awfully rude," said Toni.
"I know. She's a bully and the only thing bullies understand is other bullies."
We would often say 'you boffin!' to kids when I was at school, and some would say it to me - 'Rob's such a boffin!' - I didn't realise I was being bullied.
