Jokes
- Eddie Muir
- Posts: 14566
- Joined: 13 Oct 2007, 22:28
- Favourite book/series: Five Find-Outers and Dog
- Favourite character: Fatty
- Location: Brighton
Re: Jokes
Hilarious, Pete.
'Go down to the side-shows by the river this afternoon. I'll meet you somewhere in disguise. Bet you won't know me!' wrote Fatty.
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- Courtenay
- Posts: 19321
- Joined: 07 Feb 2014, 01:22
- Favourite book/series: The Adventure Series, Galliano's Circus
- Favourite character: Lotta
- Location: Both Aussie and British; living in Cheshire
Re: Jokes
Good ones, Pete. I'm surprised they didn't include the classic "It's not possible to lick your elbow" (followed, of course, by "You just tried to lick your elbow")...
Society Member
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
- IceMaiden
- Posts: 2300
- Joined: 07 Jan 2016, 18:49
- Favourite book/series: Too many to mention! All of them!
- Favourite character: George
- Location: North Wales
Re: Jokes
It is impossible to stand upright with your side pressed flush against the wall. As soon as you try and put both feet together you'll overbalance.
If you stand facing a wall, stretch out both arms in front of you so your fingertips are just touching the wall and swing one arm around in an anti-clockwise direction, when you put it alongside the other it will be shorter. If you swing it in a clockwise direction it will be the same length again.
It's not possible to drink and breathe at the same time beyond the first six months of your life.
Whenever you tell someone these you can guarantee they'll try them out instantly .
If you stand facing a wall, stretch out both arms in front of you so your fingertips are just touching the wall and swing one arm around in an anti-clockwise direction, when you put it alongside the other it will be shorter. If you swing it in a clockwise direction it will be the same length again.
It's not possible to drink and breathe at the same time beyond the first six months of your life.
Whenever you tell someone these you can guarantee they'll try them out instantly .
- Courtenay
- Posts: 19321
- Joined: 07 Feb 2014, 01:22
- Favourite book/series: The Adventure Series, Galliano's Circus
- Favourite character: Lotta
- Location: Both Aussie and British; living in Cheshire
Re: Jokes
My arm ends up shorter both ways. Not going to try drinking and breathing at the same time, mind you...
Society Member
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
- deepeabee
- Posts: 905
- Joined: 27 Jan 2013, 22:48
- Favourite book/series: The one I'm reading....
- Favourite character: Frederick Algernon Trotteville.
Re: Jokes
Two policemen call the station on the radio.
"Hello. Is that the Sarge?"
"Yes?"
"We have a case here. A woman has shot her husband for
stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean."
"Have you arrested the woman?"
"Not yet sir. The floor's still wet!
"Hello. Is that the Sarge?"
"Yes?"
"We have a case here. A woman has shot her husband for
stepping on the floor she had just mopped clean."
"Have you arrested the woman?"
"Not yet sir. The floor's still wet!
SwatIsaid!
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- Courtenay
- Posts: 19321
- Joined: 07 Feb 2014, 01:22
- Favourite book/series: The Adventure Series, Galliano's Circus
- Favourite character: Lotta
- Location: Both Aussie and British; living in Cheshire
Re: Jokes
Society Member
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
-
- Posts: 3
- Joined: 30 Mar 2018, 15:11
Re: Jokes
Did you hear about the man who stayed up all night wondering where the sun had gone, and suddenly it dawned on him?
- Courtenay
- Posts: 19321
- Joined: 07 Feb 2014, 01:22
- Favourite book/series: The Adventure Series, Galliano's Circus
- Favourite character: Lotta
- Location: Both Aussie and British; living in Cheshire
Re: Jokes
Society Member
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
- Courtenay
- Posts: 19321
- Joined: 07 Feb 2014, 01:22
- Favourite book/series: The Adventure Series, Galliano's Circus
- Favourite character: Lotta
- Location: Both Aussie and British; living in Cheshire
Re: Jokes
And how about this one... “Clairvoyants Society Meeting Tonight — Cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.”
Society Member
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)