I gave it my best shot. Hope it’s not too late. I thought I’d take a look at the “ideas side” of the post, only to realize I can’t separate ideas from language. You can’t really have an idea without language. And so to clarify the ideas, I have to clarify the language. Or maybe I believe this because I’m not very creative, and can only copyedit. But here are the rest of the paragraphs.
Hope the edits make sense. They are enclosed in square brackets [] - a slash “/” separates the original wording from the suggested, those without a slash mean a straight insertion or that I did not yet start keeping the original wording alongside the suggestion. They are all suggestions of course. Words like “revolutionise” and “revolutionary” are a bit loaded. I suggest “socially conscious/aware/responsible”, but to take KEVP’s advice even further, a word like “new”, or “novel”, would serve just as well in some cases, and not give anyone the idea you are advocating armed revolt! Phrases like “significant energy blocks” and “a new twist” seem to me informal, but if you are comfortable with them, then by all means keep them.
Don’t be put off by all the suggested edits. If you are too much of a perfectionist as I am, and want to get your ideas out perfectly the first time, you end up with “significant energy blocks” and so less creative!
Be like Rob, and write whatever comes into your head - you can always revise it later.
Markup wrote:On the other hand there [are] people who might be positive, [but] do not believe [enough] in themselves. They [may] have subconscious negativity and significant energy blocks that make them reluctant to bring change.
So, the blog will provide a new [angle on] how people think. They will be attracted by the incentive of growing and achieving their [own] dreams. They [will] learn [that] they [are all that is needed to] be anything [they choose to be]. [This] will give them a new perspective on themselves and their surroundings. It will make them [more] sensitive to social [and] environmental issues, and thus they would be able to perform change [effectively].
As the blog[,/delete] is used in collaboration with my peers[. I/, i]t will achieve its highest purpose as it creates a team. With multiple hands, [altogether/delete] there [will be] more ideas and more ways to achieve the one purpose. I [need/ will invite] my peers to make posters with the [quote/maxim] "I can be everything, I can do anything[,]and I will reshape many things[.]"[A]nd with that[,] they along with me, [will] need to upload pictures of us holding those posters doing [any revolutionary act/socially conscious acts] like picking up a wrapper, [giving/handing out] food, stopping a fight, [catching/uncovering] bribery. [This will all be used] with a hashtag [#?]transform yourself and revolutionise Pakistan.
[Start new paragraph] [The goal is that] this will create [a/an upwelling of] social [uproar/awareness], prompting people to look for [roots of the cause/source of the campaign?][, a/ A]s they find the Motivational Mind Blog, they will [hence/then] understand[,] and many of them [would/will] start transforming [themselves and their environment] and carrying forward the hashtag[.] [a/A]nd [hopefully] the message will bring a massive support system as all these find one platform and discuss [positivities and/positive] issues[,there/. This] will start [a great revolution/new ways of thinking] socially and environmentally. [This/It all, potentially, can] [will/delete] affect the older generations[,] and bring them together with the youth[,] and [so help to] change their perspectives.
[Pondering for some years,I/For some years now I have] wondered why Pakistan [having/still has only] a 40% [literate population had no change/literacy rate.] Why is there corruption [and bad omen/despair?] in every field[./?] I learnt [that] the physical realities could never change until the nation stood together[,] and [that] the nation can never stand [together] until there is social [revolution/change] and the mindset transform[s/ed]. I learnt [that] even water molecules transform shape [in/under] the influence of energy positive or negative[, so change is at least as natural as constancy, so there is hope for Pakistan].