The Mystery of Fitzjames Manor

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Moonraker
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Re: The Mystery of Fitzjames Manor

Post by Moonraker »

A few things struck me at the beginning. The Find-Outers were glad that Goon was so ineffective, as without such a bumbling policeman, the Find-Outers wouldn't have been needed. Daisy remarked that she hadn't thought of that, and they certainly owed Goon a big thank-you.

I didn't like the use of Bets said, Larry said and so on. I feel that said Bets, said Larry flows much better and is certainly more in Enid's style. The author also used Enid's way of explaining a word to her younger readers by using Bets - the explanation of "lot" as in auction lot, for example. A nice touch.

The vicar is the Rev Twitt. I wonder if he is related to the baker? I loved the scene where he admonishes Goon for kicking a can along the road - Goon was seething at this telling of and as soon as Twitt had gone, he hurled it over a hedge!

I wondered if children would really be allowed to examine antiques at an auction. Eustace summoned a porter to unlock a cabinet so that she could examine the puzzle box. I'm sure they would have been thrown out!

All in all, a good story in my opinion.
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Rob Houghton
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Re: The Mystery of Fitzjames Manor

Post by Rob Houghton »

From what you've written, Nigel, it actually sounds quite good. I will give it another go, as I really only read a few pages. :-D

Moonraker wrote: I didn't like the use of Bets said, Larry said and so on. I feel that said Bets, said Larry flows much better and is certainly more in Enid's style. The author also used Enid's way of explaining a word to her younger readers by using Bets - the explanation of "lot" as in auction lot, for example. A nice touch.
Generally it's grammatically correct to write 'said Bets' or 'said George' rather than 'Bets said or 'George said'. I tend to sometimes write 'Bets said' rather than the other way around - but I edited all of these out while I was proof reading 'Narrowboat'. :-)

I've also noticed that Enid very rarely attributes the speech before the speech-marks - so she rarely writes - 'George said, "Look! A cave!".' but would more usually write it as - "Look! A cave!" said George.' 8)
As soon as speech is attributed before the speech it completely destroys the Blyton style, so I always avoid that too. 8)
'Oh voice of Spring of Youth
hearts mad delight,
Sing on, sing on, and when the sun is gone
I'll warm me with your echoes
through the night.'

(E. Blyton, Sunday Times, 1951)



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