Jokes

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Rob Houghton
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Re: Jokes

Post by Rob Houghton »

You slay me Pete, but time to rein it in, now, I think! :twisted:
'Oh voice of Spring of Youth
hearts mad delight,
Sing on, sing on, and when the sun is gone
I'll warm me with your echoes
through the night.'

(E. Blyton, Sunday Times, 1951)



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Courtenay
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Re: Jokes

Post by Courtenay »

You're not giving him a kick in the be-hind? :D
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It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
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pete9012S
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Re: Jokes

Post by pete9012S »

Image
" A kind heart always brings its own reward," said Mrs. Lee.
- The Christmas Tree Aeroplane -

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Jack400
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Re: Jokes

Post by Jack400 »

Courtenay wrote::lol: Reminds me of something I once saw written in a much-graffitied loo at university (if not the exact words, it was to this effect):

"The more you study, the more you learn.
The more you learn, the more you forget.
The more you forget, the less you know.
So why study?"

Underneath which someone else had written: "What are you doing at this university then??" :P
I can't remember- I think I wanted the toilet...

With appropriate apologies for lifting Courtenay's post from another thread.
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Eddie Muir
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Re: Jokes

Post by Eddie Muir »

A Senior's Moment

A little silver-haired lady calls her neighbour and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her neighbour asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The little silver haired lady says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her neighbour decides to go over and help with the puzzle.

She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster."

He takes her hand and says, "Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then, "he said with a deep sigh, "let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."
'Go down to the side-shows by the river this afternoon. I'll meet you somewhere in disguise. Bet you won't know me!' wrote Fatty.

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pete9012S
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Re: Jokes

Post by pete9012S »

:D :D
" A kind heart always brings its own reward," said Mrs. Lee.
- The Christmas Tree Aeroplane -

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Courtenay
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Re: Jokes

Post by Courtenay »

It was a blonde and her (presumably non-blond) boyfriend the last time I heard that one. :twisted:
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It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
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IceMaiden
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Re: Jokes

Post by IceMaiden »

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Brilliant! :mrgreen:
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I'm just an old fashioned girl with an old fashioned mind
Not sophisticated, I'm the sweet and simple kind
I want an old fashioned house, with an old fashioned fence
And A̶n̶ ̶o̶l̶d̶ ̶f̶a̶s̶h̶i̶o̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶m̶i̶l̶l̶i̶o̶n̶a̶i̶r̶e̶
Image
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pete9012S
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Re: Jokes

Post by pete9012S »

Image

I can't think of a suitable caption for this one???
" A kind heart always brings its own reward," said Mrs. Lee.
- The Christmas Tree Aeroplane -

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Domino
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Re: Jokes

Post by Domino »

Vladimir: "I'll put in my two roubles worth and you can trump it."
Donald: "I always said Kim was a good man."
He called the greatest archers to a tavern on the green.

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pete9012S
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Re: Jokes

Post by pete9012S »

:D :D
" A kind heart always brings its own reward," said Mrs. Lee.
- The Christmas Tree Aeroplane -

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sixret
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Re: Jokes

Post by sixret »

Image
I stand with justice and the truth. Palestine will be free from the river to the sea.

Learn the history. Do research.

The hypocrisy, double standard, prejudice and bigotry own by some people is so obvious.Shame on them!
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Domino
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Re: Jokes

Post by Domino »

Image

"Look. kid. there's only room for one trench coat in this film and that's gonna be mine. If you
dont take yours off right now, you're gonna regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but
soon and for the rest of your life."
He called the greatest archers to a tavern on the green.

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Jack400
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Re: Jokes

Post by Jack400 »

pete9012S wrote:Image

I can't think of a suitable caption for this one???
"Which one's James Bond"?
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pete9012S
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Re: Jokes

Post by pete9012S »

Image
" A kind heart always brings its own reward," said Mrs. Lee.
- The Christmas Tree Aeroplane -

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